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Living with Schizoaffective Disorder

My Sparky Brain:
I Have a Serious Neurological Problem

I was in the Emergency Room twice this week for Aphasia both in my speech and in my writing.
When I spoke what I heard myself saying was not what other people heard.

Michael David Crawford, Baritone,

Saturday, May 26, 2018

It doesn't show up in a CT or an MRI scan.

When the Diagnostic Radiologist report said my scans were normal I was immediately discharged with no diagnosis, no medicine and no referral.

I got a referral from my Primary Care Physician for August 11th but am concerned that's too long to wait.

A couple hours ago I dialed 9-1-1 then asked the dispatcher to send a cop to the bus stop where I'd just left enough Happy Pills to sedate a herd of buffalo. He found two young men who handed them over when the cop asked if they'd seen my medicine. Some of my meds are sedating enough to interest a recreational pharmaceutical enthusiast but to take any other of my Happy Pills to get high could have killed them, or made them andidates for liver transplants.

Just yesterday I left my backpack at Starbucks.

Early this last week I left my backpack at a different Starbucks.

Week before last I left my uncommonly large - and so very warm - Merino Wool Neck Scarf on the light rail. While I immediately filed a Lost And Found report nobody turned it in. My only comfort is that whoever found it will have a comfy warm neck this coming Winter.

A little over a month ago I kicked coffee cold-turkey. I didn't think I was drinking that much but I experienced severe headaches for a month and nausea for two weeks.

I am now under doctor's orders to resume drinking coffee. After I post this mail I'll step out to Tonalli's Donuts & Cream for a cup of The Demon Coffee.

All of these things occurred after my last Emergency Room Visit.

In my life I have experienced four quite serious concussions. One happened a few seconds after one of the others and left me unconscious for three days. When I woke up while I could visualize the correct spelling of my name when I thought about it I could not spell it correctly when I tried to write it on paper with a pencil.

I experienced brain seizures from 2010 to 2014. I've been seizure-free since I stopped taking Depakote and started taking Trileptal.

TODO Trileptal doesn't prevent Mania.

Three of those seizures lasted as long as several days during which I experienced Fugue States:

TODO quote a paragraph or three

Despite that I was unconscious, I appeared to other people to be fully conscious, up walking around and talking but a way that made no sense to anyone. Whoever had captured my mind and body led a hotel desk clerk to dial 9-1-1 when I said something about "alien conspiracies"./p>

In 2014 a Neurologist gave me an Electroencephalograph Test then diagnosed me as having Seizure Disorder. To me that sounds just like "I'm Not Feeling Well Disorder". They tell me I don't have Epilepsy but don't have anything else to say beyond just that.

My Fugue States he diagnoses as "Altered Levels Of Consciousness" (ALOC).

I at least have the comfort of knowing that I don't have brain cancer.

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